Archive for category Family life
Car-Free Chronicles
Posted by Abby Quillen in Alternative transportation, Family life, Parenting, Social movements on April 18, 2011
When my son Ezra was an infant, he was no fan of the car. Car rides, even short jaunts around town, invariably included crying and multiple comfort stops. But, at some point, my almost-three-year-old became a huge admirer of the automobile – perhaps right around the time we sold ours.
“Mama, we need a truck. A big, huge truck. We can drive it all over the streets,” he remarks as we walk past a neighbor’s pickup.
“Dada, we should buy a car at the store,” he insists as we cross the parking lot to the grocery store. “We need a car.”
On the rare occasions when we rent a car, Ezra is ecstatic. “I can’t drive the car yet,” he explains as he crawls into his car seat. “My feet don’t reach the gas pedals. I will drive it when I’m this tall.” He waves his hand a few feet over his head.
Sometimes I wonder if our car-free experiment, now in its eighth month, is cementing our son’s love for all things automobile. One day he’ll undoubtedly drive a monster truck and eschew gardens, clotheslines, and hand-washing dishes.
But if our experiment has made my son more enamored with cars, it has only reinforced my husband and my ambivalence about car ownership.
A few weeks ago, my mother-in-law flew in from New York and rented a car for the week. We loved seeing her, and having a car around was great in lots of ways. We ran all kinds of errands and visited both the coast and the forest. I was able to zip over to a nearby town to interview someone for an article. My husband and I marveled at the convenience and warmth of cruising across town while rain pounded down. We shot sympathetic glances at cyclists who passed by us dripping wet and dressed head-to-toe in rain gear.
Then midway through my mother-in-law’s visit, my husband and I biked across town to run an errand.
“I feel alive again,” my husband said as we pedaled down the path. I couldn’t help but agree. For all the convenience of the car, I had really missed walking and riding my bike.
Plus, as my husband mused, car ownership is expensive — not only because of the car’s price tag, $3.80 a gallon gas, and the inevitable maintenance. With the exception of the ocean and hiking trails (which I love and miss visiting more often), we noticed that the car tended to take us to places where the main activity is spending money – notably malls, box stores, and home improvement centers. We hadn’t visited these places in about eight months, and we hadn’t missed them.
Apparently my husband and I are not alone in our ambivalence about car ownership. Car sharing was all over the news last week, when Zipcar, a car-sharing service with 560,000 members in 14 cities, went public on Thursday and raised an impressive $174.3 million in its initial public offering. Peer-to-peer car share services, like RelayRides, which allow car owners to rent out their own vehicles, have also been getting a lot of press.
The Oregon House of Representatives just passed a car sharing bill with overwhelming support. If it passes in the senate, it will allow car owners to rent their cars to friends or neighbors through a car sharing service without fear of losing insurance policies or facing increased rates.
As our planned one-year car-free experiment nears an end, we go back and forth about whether to buy another vehicle. Oddly, my husband, who once drove the car almost exclusively to commute to work and shop for groceries, is the one who’s more convinced we can live without one. He’s adapted amazingly well to commuting about 12 miles a day on his bike, and he’s in the best shape of his life because of it.
I rarely drove the car when we owned one, preferring to walk and ride my bike, but I’m more torn about whether we should buy another one this summer. I don’t want a car loan, and I don’t miss the stress and worries involved with maintaining an older vehicle. On the other hand, in a few months, we’ll have a new baby, who won’t be able to ride in a bike trailer or bike seat for quite awhile. I’m a huge fan of walking, and Eugene has decent public transportation, but I know a car will make daily life with an infant and three-year-old easier, a seductive idea as I contemplate caring for two little ones.
Hopefully car sharing will become an option for more of us soon, making decisions like my family’s easier and providing extra income opportunities for those who invest in car ownership. In the meantime, at least we know how Ezra will vote when we have to decide whether to shop for another vehicle.
As my mother-in-law packed, Ezra cried and told her how much he was going to miss her. Then, as we lugged her bags out to the rental car to say our goodbyes, we realized he was also going to miss something else.
“Grandma, please don’t take the red car,” he cried. “Can’t you walk to New York?”
Interested in reading more about car-free living? Check out these posts:
Happy News
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life, Parenting on April 13, 2011
As spring blossoms around us, we’re anticipating an exciting change for our little family. We’re expecting another baby, due at the end of August.
It feels entirely different than the first time, mostly because there’s much less research and preparation involved this go around. We already have an amazing team of midwives, who we’re thrilled to be working with again.
We took a minimalist approach to baby gear last time and found that we had everything we needed, so we’re planning to do the same this time. And since we waited to find out our son’s gender until the big day (and we’re planning to do that again this time), we’re well-stocked with gender-neutral newborn apparel.
Really, all there seems to be to do is wait, mull over names, and devise strategies for keeping up with two little people. Apparently other people are doing it, so at least we know it’s theoretically possible.
Finally…
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life, Household, Nature on April 6, 2011
Not only am I finally back to blogging … but it’s finally feeling like spring here! I always forget how uplifting good weather can be until these first few warm spring days are upon us.
“The sun’s coming down,” my son squeals, as he opens the front door. “Let’s go to a little walk.” Then he races to get his new bike. Oh yes, we’re taking many walks each day around here. Flowers are blooming, trees are budding, birds are singing.
Thanks so much for your patience during my March sabbatical. As always seems to happen when I decide to take time off from one thing, a deluge of unexpected happenings crowded in to take its place. It was a blur of a month, with a not-so-fun (but minor) illness for my son, out-of-town guests, and an article assignment.
I must say, it’s nice to be back to the old routines. Of course, now with the long days and rain breaks, we don’t have much excuse not to be out in the garden, do we?
I hope you’re enjoying some spring weather wherever you are.
5 Ways to Make February Fabulous
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life on February 9, 2011
Photo Credit: Amanda M. Hatfield
“In the coldest February, as in every other month in every other year, the best thing to hold on to is each other.” – Linda Ellerbee
So maybe I was a tad optimistic in that title. Perhaps I should have stuck with “fine” or “fair”. We are talking about February, after all. I often find this month a bit, well, challenging. All of the newness of the year – the parties, the resolutions, the bowls of black-eyed peas – too often give way to the realization that there are lots of cloudy days and long cold nights to go as my little corner of the earth rotates back toward the sun.
I love winter. It just has considerably more appeal in November, when sweaters, crackling fires, and root vegetables are still novelties. Apparently I’m not alone. A quick Google search turns up dozens of articles and blog posts entitled, “February Sucks,” lamenting everything from Valentine’s Day to midterms to sinus infections.
But this month, I decided I will not just quietly cope with my February malaise. I’m on a mission to pull February from its shadowy reputation – at least in our house. In August, as we’re sitting outside watching the sun set at nine and eating vine-ripened tomatoes, hopefully we’ll say, “This is nice, but remember February?”
Maybe you can use some February mood-lifters too? Here are five ways I’m hoping to rescue this poor wreck of a month:
1. Plan the Garden
What’s the next best thing to eating those first sweet, crunchy snap peas and juicy raspberries? Dreaming about them, of course. And what better way to do that then to sketch out some garden plans? Last year, planning was my key to gardening success, and I learned a lot from what worked and didn’t work. I’m looking forward to spending some February afternoons with a cup of tea, some gardening books, and my sketch pad.
If you don’t have space or desire for a garden, you could plan some containers for your deck, or a window box, or adopt a house plant. Just glimpsing plants has been found to speed the recovery of surgery patients and improve workers’ job satisfaction. Hopefully plants can help rescue February too, a month altogether wanting for more shrubbery.
2. Invite someone new over for dinner
We have new neighbors, who also happen to be old acquaintances, and we’ve been meaning to invite them over for awhile to welcome them to the neighborhood. February is calling for a break-up in the old routines. Why not invite someone new over to your house too? It’s the perfect excuse for a feast. Eat. Play some games. Discuss ways to spruce up February.
3. Create something everyday
Around this time of year, after all of the baking and the making that comes with the holidays, I often find myself in a creativity lull. Dr. Kelly Lambert might say this explains why February is so challenging for me. She asserts that cooking, knitting, sewing, building, or repairing things with our hands and seeing tangible results from our efforts bathes our brains in feel-good chemicals. I know she’s right. I feel much better when I’m creative. “An art or craft everyday” is my new February motto.
4. Listen to music
Music – notably up-tempo music played in a major key – makes people happy. Research indicates that listening to music we enjoy triggers the release of the natural opiates known as endorphins. And in studies, music has been found to boost surgery patients’ immune systems, lower stress in pregnant women, and reduce complications from cardiac surgery. I know music makes everyone in my house happier, and yet I often simply forget to turn it on. I hereby proclaim February the month of music. We will listen, sing, play, and dance.
5. Start a new tradition
Okay, so I’ve come up with a few ways to improve the next couple of weeks, but what about next February and the February after? I mean, if I’m going to make this a legendary month, we need a tradition that we talk about all year. Should we make valentines? Or truffles? Go on a scavenger hunt? Take off for a weekend getaway? I haven’t decided yet … I’m hoping you’ll share your ideas.
Do you love February, or at least like it? Do you have any fabulous February traditions? I’d love to hear from you.
A Snapshot of Time in America
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life on January 31, 2011
Photo Credit: Laineys Repertoire
Number of hours in a year:
8,760
Number of hours the average American spends sleeping each year (2009):
Number of hours the average employed American spends working each year (2009):
Number of hours the average American spends watching television each year (2008):
Number of hours the average American spends on housework, cooking, and lawn care each year (2009):
Number of hours the average American spends on the Internet each year (2009):
Number of hours the average American spends eating each year (2009):
Number of hours the average American spends taking care of other family members each year (2009):
Number of hours the average American spends exercising each year (2009):
Number of hours the average child spends in school each year (2002):
Number of hours the average child between 8 and 18 spends using electronics each year (2009):
Number of hours the average child between 8 and 18 spends texting each year (2008):
Fraction of awake hours the average preschool-aged child in a home-based daycare spends watching TV each day (2009):
This is part of a New Urban Habitat series: Snapshots of America:
Car-Free is Carefree
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life, Simple Living on January 10, 2011
Sometimes I miss the family car, especially when my friends seem to so effortlessly come and go, while my husband and I are plotting out our trips, negotiating whether we can fit all of our groceries in our bike trailer, and opting to stay home at times rather than trek across town after dark in the rain. But recently I came across a few more reasons to celebrate the car-free life.
We started 2011 with the highest gas prices ever in January, averaging $3.01 a gallon. In December, John Hofmeister, the former president of Shell Oil predicted that gas will reach $5.00 a gallon within two years. More conservative forecasters predict that it will top out at $3.50 to $3.75 sometime this summer.
Of course, being car-free doesn’t make us entirely immune to high gasoline prices, since they trickle down into the cost of everything that’s transported. But it sure is nice not to have to pay for it at the pump.
And if high gas prices aren’t enough to make people want to park the car these days, accidents may make more think twice.
On December 9, NPR reported that five children a day die in car crashes. They are the leading cause of death for children, topping home accidents, illness, and poisoning. “I think it happens so frequently and with such regularity that we’ve lost focus on how important it is. And I think that we’re so reliant on cars to get us from Point A to Point B that we’ve sort of accepted it as the price of doing business. ” Ben Hoffman, professor of pediatrics at the University of New Mexico School of Medicine, told NPR.
NPR focused on the National Transportation Safety Board’s new recommendation that children ride in rear-facing car seats until they are two, citing that toddlers are five times safer facing backward than forward.
Or, of course, you could also just stay out of the car altogether.
Living car-free doesn’t make us immune to accidents either. We are fortunate to have an extensive network of off-street bike paths in Eugene, but it’s impossible to avoid riding our bikes on the streets altogether. And as much as I love walking, I’m all too aware that it can be risky. I know two pedestrians who were hit by cars – one fatally while walking down the sidewalk and another who was hit while crossing with the light at an intersection. But I do feel a little safer avoiding the highways. And the more people who choose to travel on bikes, on foot, or on public transportation the safer we’ll all be.
So at this moment, the car-free life really does feel like a carefree option.
5 Tension Tamers for Your Holiday Gathering
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life on December 15, 2010
Credit: David Louden
Do the holidays bring you more anxiety than joy? Do verging political views, differing lifestyle choices, or rivalries make your family holiday gatherings feel like a bed of dry tinder ready to spark? You’re not alone. Last year 90 percent of participants in a nation-wide “Holiday Stress Index” survey said the holidays cause them stress and anxiety, and 77 percent said conflict is an inevitable part of their holiday gatherings.
As much as we love them, family members can be an incredible source of tension, especially this time of year, when fantasies about perfect holidays can come into a collision course with reality – at the dinner table.
If you’re expecting more protraction than pleasure at your holiday gathering, here are a few surefire tension tamers:
1. Serve something soothing
Some herbalists call lemon balm the “herb of good cheer”. A friend of mine swears that every time she serves it to her difficult mother-in-law, within an hour, they’re getting along great. It may be worth a try. Lemon balm eases stress and anxiety, aids digestion, assuages head-aches, and increases concentration. In other words, it’s the perfect drink for a tense holiday gathering. You can buy it in bags or in the bulk section of most health food stores.
Other good bets: oat straw, chamomile, or catnip.
2. Replace competitive board games
If your sister-in-law is more competitive than Vince Lombardi, or your annual game of charades always leaves someone in tears, it might be time to introduce entertainment that encourages a more harmonious spirit. Family Pastimes, a Canadian company, sells board games that foster co-operation and teamwork. They’re challenging, but everyone works together toward a goal rather than going head-to-head against each other.
Conversation starter cards are another way to encourage civility instead of conflict. Each card has a provocative question to jump-start lively dialogue. You can buy them here. Or you can make them yourself. Here are a few samples, to give you an idea of the kind of open-ended questions you’ll want to ask.
3. Introduce humor
In 1979 Norman Cousins was diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis, a rare debilitating disease, and he was given almost no chance to live. But he recovered with his own self-created therapy. His medicine? Laughter. He watched Marx Brothers comedies, “Candid Camera”, and other goof-ball comedies. He documented that a ten-minute belly laugh gave him two hours of pain-free sleep. Now just imagine what it could do for your stressful holiday gathering. Ask everyone to bring a joke. Tell funny stories. Watch a funny movie. Laugh.
4. Get outside
Numerous studies show that viewing or getting out into nature helps us relieve stress. In one study, surgical patients randomly assigned to a room with a view of trees required less pain medicine, healed faster, and were discharged sooner. So after dinner, why not head outside for a relaxing walk around the neighborhood? You’ll probably all feel better when you get home.
5. Simplify gift-giving
What was the biggest source of stress for participants in that “Holiday Stress Index” survey? You guessed it. Gift-giving. Fifty-six percent of people said they feel cash-strapped around the holidays. If gift-giving is something you dread, or if it feels like it’s a competitive sport in your family to see who can spend the most, simplifying your gift-giving tradition will probably relieve a lot of tension. Paring down the presents doesn’t have to feel like deprivation. There are lots of fun and creative alternatives to traditional gift-giving. Last week, I shared 10 ideas here.
Warning: you’ll probably want to suggest any big changes to your gift-giving tradition for next year, since some people finish their Christmas shopping before now (or at least that’s what I’ve been told).
More thoughts on this subject:
- How to Get Along With Family – Better World Blog
- Avoiding Family Stress and Conflict During the Holidays – Communication Currents
- Stress, Depression, and the Holidays: 10 Tips for Coping – The Mayo Clinic
- Keeping Your Cool at Family Holiday Gatherings – Parent Dish
- Holiday Traditions That Raise Happiness – Greater Good
Celebrate the First Day of Winter
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life, Nature on December 8, 2010
Credit: Anssi Koskinen
December 21 is the shortest day of the year in the northern hemisphere. Locales above the Arctic Circle, including parts of Canada, Alaska, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Russia, Greenland, and the very northern tip of Iceland will experience 24 hours of total darkness. You can find out when the sun will rise and set where you live here.
Winter was a long, dark, and difficult time for many of our forebears. The solstice provided an opportunity for people to celebrate the return of more daylight.
How did ancient people celebrate?
- Gift-giving
The ancient Romans exchanged candles and other gifts during Saturnalia, their week-long solstice celebration.
- Role-switching
In Persia, the king changed places with one of his subjects on the winter solstice, and the subject was crowned during an elaborate street party.
In Rome, masters and servants switched roles; senators wore simple, rather than elaborate togas; men sometimes dressed as women; fights and grudges were forgotten; and other everyday conventions were put aside.
- Candle-lighting
In England and Scandinavia, people lit a Yule log, or oak branch, which was often replaced by a large candle that burned throughout the day.
- Bonfires
Japanese Shinto farmers lit fires on the mountain sides to welcome back the sun.
- Mistletoe and Evergreen Trees
The British Celts put mistletoe on their altars. And the Germans and Romans decorated their houses with evergreen trees, wreaths, and garlands as a symbol of life and renewed fertility.
- Sun Festivals
The Hopi celebrated the return of the sun with ceremonies. Priests dressed in animal skins with feathers in their head-dresses to look like the rays of the sun.
Why celebrate the first day of winter?
The holiday season is busy enough for most of us. Why add anything else to the to-do list?
Celebrating the first day of each season has many benefits. It offers the perfect opportunity to:
- Note the cyclical changes in the soil, sky, trees, plants, and wildlife.
- Reflect on the lessons each time of year imparts. Winter, for example, reminds us of the importance of quiet, rest, and dormancy.
- Learn about different celebrations around the world.
- Celebrate! And seasonal celebrations are affordable, nature-based, and as easy or elaborate as you want them to be.
- Be grateful for the gifts of food, family, and friendship.
The key to celebrating the first day of winter, when most of us are busy planning other celebrations, is to keep it simple, and choose traditions that give you time to relax and reflect.
Some ideas:
- Establish a table-top, shelf, or mantel to display a seasonal tableau. On the first day of winter, replace the fall decorations with evergreen boughs, pine cones, candles, mistletoe, or whatever symbolizes fall in your family.
- Collect books about the seasons at yard sales, used-book stores, and thrift shops year-round. Choose a special basket or shelf for them, and change them out on the first day of each season. Or take a trip to the library a few days before your celebration. Some of my family’s favorite winter picture-books are: Stella, Queen of the Snow by Mary-Louise Gay; The Big Snow by Berta Hader; The Snowy Day by Ezra Jack Keats; A Kitten Tale by Eric Rohmann; Snow by Cynthia Rylant; Winter is the Warmest Season by Lauren Stringer; and Owl Moon by Jane Yolen.
- Read aloud from The Winter Solstice by Ellen Jackson.
- Go for a nature walk or go cross-country skiing, and enjoy the brisk air and winter scenery.
- Watch the sun rise and set.
- Make a seasonal feast, with foods like beets, winter squash, potatoes, onions, kale, cabbage, or parsnips.
- Eat by candlelight.
- Blow out the candles and turn off the lights after dinner, sit together quietly, and experience and reflect on darkness.
- Share one thing you’ve lost and one thing you’ve gained over the past year.
- Bring an evergreen bough inside and make it into a wishing tree. Secure the bough in a bucket with rocks. Cut leaves out of green construction paper. Have each person write down a wish for the coming year on each leaf. Hang the leaves on the tree using a hole punch and yarn or ribbon.
- Sit around the fire or cuddle under blankets and tell stories about your best and worst holiday memories.
Resources:
- The Winter Solstice by John Matthews
- The Book of the Year: A Brief History of Our Seasonal Holidays by Anthony Aveni
- Celebrate the Solstice by Richard Heinberg
- Ceremonies of the Seasons by Jennifer Cole
- The Winter Solstice by Ellen Jackson
(Updated version of post from December 14, 2009.)
How do you celebrate the change in the seasons?
10 Ways to Take Back the Holidays
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life on December 6, 2010
“Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money.” ~Author Unknown
By now, we’ve all probably seen and heard news stories like this:
- Holiday Season Gets Off to a Good Start
- It’s Going to Be a Merry Christmas for Retail
- Holiday Shopping Spree Good News for the Economy
At some point, we started equating the holidays with heading out to the mall for a shopping frenzy. The average American plans to spend $714 on gifts this month. All too often, the recipients of these presents don’t need them, and we can’t really afford them. And along the way, the holidays became known for two things: stress and debt.
Christmas was magical when I was a kid. We went to my grandparents and opened presents under the tree, then we played and ate for the rest of the day. I loved getting gifts. But what I loved more was that the day had meaning. It wasn’t like any other day. Many of the things I remember most about the holidays cost almost nothing – handmade advent calendars, stringing popcorn and cranberries, making ornaments out of dough, and playing with my cousins.
This year, I’m on a mission to make the holidays debt-and-stress free – and magical. If you’re feeling the same way, here are 10 ideas to take back your holidays from consumerism:
1. Plan an outing to be the center of your festivities.
Go ice skating. Take a carriage ride. Or go hiking, cross country skiing, or caroling.
2. In lieu of traditional gift giving, do a homemade gift exchange.
Agree that all presents must be homemade – baked goods, art, songs, stories, poems, or crafts.
3. Focus on quality over quantity.
Shop at a local craft market. If you don’t have one, shop at Etsy.com. Include information about the artisans with your gifts.
4. Exchange books.
Support authors and the spread of the written word and ideas. Looking for a greener or thriftier option than new books? Shop at a used bookstore.
5. Create some new family traditions.
Make up a board game and play it. Put on a puppet show. Draw, paint, or craft as a family. Get creative and have fun.
6. Observe the winter solstice.
Make the first day of winter a simple, festive day focused on the change of the seasons, family, and friendship. (Stay tuned for my Wednesday post all about this topic.)
7. Revise your holiday feast.
If making a huge dinner brings more stress than satisfaction, throw a potluck or pare down your holiday fare.
8. Take a holiday from work and tune into each other.
Spend at least a few days not thinking about or checking in with your job, if possible. Also consider a sabbatical from the Internet, Smart Phone, and whatever else distracts you from your family.
9. Write personal letters.
Instead of sending presents to faraway friends and family, write them letters in your own handwriting.
10. Focus on the beauty and meaning of the day.
Decorate. Play music. Light candles. Make cookies. Cuddle on the couch. Tell stories. Read together. Stay present and breathe deeply.
More ideas on taking back the holidays:
- Hiking for the Holidays by Renee Tougas – Adventure in Progress
- A Dozen Donation Tips for the Holidays by Erin Burt- Boston Globe
- The Case against buying Christmas presents by Leo Babauta – Zen Habits
- Christmas With No Presents by Colin Beavan – YES! Magazine
- How I Rescued Myself From Holiday Shopping Through a Donation Exchange by Neal Gorenflo – Shareable
What are your ideas for making the holidays debt-and-stress free – and magical?
Finding Wildness
Posted by Abby Quillen in Family life, Nature on November 29, 2010
“In wildness is the preservation of the world.” – Henry David Thoreau
Credit: Ed Yourdon
My son didn’t want to leave the park. He tugged on my hand, pulling me toward the swings. “Let’s stay here.”
The wind was starting to blow, rain spattering our faces. “Come on. I’m hungry,” my husband called. He was already halfway down the sidewalk, dragging my son’s scooter behind him.
Out of the corner of my eye, I glimpsed something in the sky.
“Look at the birds,” I called.
The three of us turned and stared up as hundreds of starlings swarmed across the gray sky. They moved into a black mass, and then spread out, shifting together and apart, like dancers in a ballet. After a few minutes they landed all at once on a nearby oak tree, settling into its decaying leaves and gnarled branches, almost camouflaged, except for their cacophonous birdsong.
My husband cut across a field toward the tree. My son and I followed, the swings forgotten. We stood together, speechless, as we watched the starlings swarm into the sky and land, again and again.
It reminded me of other wild moments I’ve witnessed. Years ago, at Yellowstone, my husband and I trekked along a hillside at dawn, listening to an elk bugling. Then we glimpsed him on an opposite hillside, his muscular body and massive antlers silhouetted against the pale sky.
Another time, on a sweltering July day in Colorado, we lugged gear up a steep, rocky trail to an off-the-beaten-path campsite my husband had discovered as a kid. We made multiple trips from our car to the site. Then, just as we slumped into our lawn chairs, a brown bear lumbered into our campsite.
More recently, we sat on a jutting rock next to the Pacific watching waves roll in and glimpsed a whale a few miles from shore.
Watching the starlings was a similar experience – unexpected and wild. Except this time, we were just a few blocks from our home.
I’ve always loved going to nature – driving up mountain roads, finding wildness in alpine snowdrifts and aspen groves, atop fourteen-thousand-foot mountains, amidst old-growth stands, and on wind-swept beaches. These days, we do less of that. We ride our bikes and walk almost everywhere we go, and we usually spend our days off exploring the ten square miles of urban land where we’ve lived for almost a decade.
I miss driving into the wilderness, but I’m discovering that wildness is not something we need to drive to find. It’s all around us. Starlings swarm. Squirrels scavenge for acorns. Deer munch on our neighbors’ arborvitae. Wild turkeys wander the hills above our house. Ducks swoop through our neighborhood.
These creatures are our neighbors, so perhaps the moments when they surprise us and render us speechless are even more wild than the ones we traveled miles to see, binoculars in hand.
It reminds me of something I heard the nature writer David Gessner say in an interview. He travels around the world, experiencing nature, but some of his most wild moments have been at home.
I was with my dad when he died and heard his breathing slow. I was with my daughter when she was born, and these are wild moments too. For me, the key to wildness is its integration with our so-called normal lives.
(To watch this video, you must click over to YouTube. It’s worth it.)
Have you experienced any wild moments close to home? I’d love to hear about it.
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